A ray of light from the self

I was going through low moods for some days - work was not going well, quarrel and expectations with family going worse, not enriching, feeling bad about myself and depressed, worried about how I will get the work done. Though I do morning pooja and feel blissful during those moments, the moment I finish it and come back to the daily world, I re-pick up incompletion from where I left it.

I didn't notice it initially, but I noticed this after a few persistent days. I was feeling Self Hatred and all impossibilities, depression. Busy from morning to night with office work, moving like a tortoise and missing morning yoga or any physical activity for that matter. Completely in non-integrity.

I noticed a lady in the Nithyananda Sangha. People were all wishing her a happy birthday, even Sri Nithyananda Swamiji wished her. She was very happy and devoted to Swamiji. But I was carrying an incompletion and felt she did not take any responsibility as per Swamiji's expectations. I realize this is simply my perception, I even don't know her more than a few minutes conversation. The point is, she was happy and active in Whatsapp sharing her happiness and bliss.

Ha, isn't that what Swamiji wants from us. To be blissful. Whatever situation I am in, however miserable, incomplete or inauthentic I may be, it is just a self torturous imagination.

Amritasya Putraha. Whatever I wanted, has happened over a period of time. Frustration is when what I wanted has changed and I am not getting what I wanted now. I earlier wished for some thing a hundred times, I got it now. Now, my order changed. This is the cause of frustration. Cosmos will give it to me within some time. Have trust in myself, Swamiji, others and the Cosmos.

Be a light unto yourself. I am the son of immortality. Everything will pass. Be cheerful and blissful. Radiate enlightenment.