Happiness is the new Productivity and blissful morning excitement

Well, I am at my lowest, feeling lost, confused, tired. What am I doing with my life? Postponing, messing up my career, life, work, spirituality, family...

Yesterday I had this inspirational whim, "Life Planner". Have a planner to track and manage the multiple areas and tasks of life. Not just domestic tasks, but long term goals, proper focused tracking and accomplishing goals. Yes, I have tried it multiple times and lost sight of them pretty soon. When office work increases, feeling doing too much work, there is deadline, fear, just rethinking the same thing again and again, empty decision making...

I don't take care of me and my life, who will?

Bought this, "I Can-I Will Success Planner Diary Organizer Weekly Monthly Yearly 2017 Hardbound (FSP17HB)"

Started browsing randomly on such inspirational books, found some good articles,

A book,

Invincible Arjuna

Tell me what you can see, Arjuna,’ repeated Drona ‘Do you see the tree?’
‘No,’ said Arjuna.
‘Do you then see the bird?’ There was a sense of rising excitement in Drona’s voice.
‘No! I can simply see the eye of the bird, nothing else,’ responded Arjuna without taking his eyes off the target.
‘Now, shoot!’ Drona commanded in a shrill voice.
Everyone who stood there saw Arjuna’s arrow whizz past and heard a sharp click. The arrow was stuck in the middle of the bird’s eye.

That day, a legend was born. Arjuna was declared a shreshtha, a supreme human talent. Arjuna’s most powerful weapon was not his Gandiva. His power came from ekagrata—his one-pointed concentration.

Arjuna re-defined the limits of human achievement. He conquered his enemies with the sword of clarity and the shield of discrimination.

Another book,

The Code of the Extraordinary Mind

Here, the author Vishen is the co-founder of a large company, the Mindvalley. He explains that being happy, doing what you love and happy will actually fetch you lots of money and fulfillment. But you need a vision and goal too. But just chase your whims and fantasies.

My God! Thats what Swamiji has been telling for a long time. Be Blissful! Find the bliss within, do your morning rituals and routines, experience Bhava Samadhi. It will be a part of you all the time.

The next morning, getting up from sleep at around 7. I was feeling the low again. Bored, tired, confused... not feeling excited. I held the Garbha gifted by Sri Nithyanda Swamiji, my dear Guru and prayed. Please help me, help me with this confusion and dullness.

Suddenly, a wave of inspiration started arising in me. Be Blissful. Happiness, joy, bliss. Live in it. Count your blessings, be grateful for what you have.

I started getting so happy and excited with my present state. Words cannot express the emotions. We have to really feel these emotions. I started expressing joy and gratitude for my wife, kids, parents, parents-in-laws, house, society, Guru, car, my mind. Even though there is so much confusion, my minds supports me even now thinking rationally and logically. Thank you so much for all these.

I really experienced the Garbha working. Decided to be like a child. Drop any judgment, dislike towards others. Why am I carrying them in me? Suddenly, remembered what Swamiji said, 'Be complete'. I should not carry any anger, dislike, their disapproval of me, any incompletion within me. My space is not for all those. My space is sacred, it is for joy. bliss and sacred feelings.

I am joyful, grateful, blissful. There is no need to doubt myself and my capabilities. Shed the fear. Shed the incompletions. Rise and shine. I started affirming and believing Auspiciousness flowing in me, I am auspicious. Whatever I touch and do will be successful.

I remember how much depression, confusion, boredom, pain... I carried within me. Others opinions and mockery of me. My hatred and dislike of others... Completion with myself and others means not carrying any of these.

Thank you Swamiji for expressing these Satyas. In Eternal Gratitude.