After doing something half way, we pre-decide from our past pains, "What's the point? Its no use..." This is Self Denial, part of the SDHD - Self Doubt, Self Hatred, Self Denial.
How do I know it won't work this time? I have tried multiple times and failed. But why do I decide it won't work this time too? What if there is a change, there is a difference each time?
Isn't it after all just a decision? A small single decision. A single small decision. A single small decision each time. Repeat it every moment. But at every moment, its only a single small decision. Just that! A single small decision Now!
Arey, who will support me if I myself don't. If I judge that its no use, isn't it judging, which Christ said, "Do not judge others'. I am judging myself and life by, "Its no use."
Sadashiva, KaalaBhairava, you are the Destroyer, Rejuvenator, I pray to you to liberate me from these wrong decisions. I drop them at your feet each moment. I just have to decide this moment, that is all. I am that!
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